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Post by seraph on Sept 19, 2005 22:49:47 GMT -5
So about a week ago i broke up with my boyfriend. I just don't know what to do, i wanna talk to him and still be friends, but maybe we need space. but i don't wanna lose him and i feel that because i am distancing myself from him due to trying to grow spiratually that i am making him worry even more. and whenever i express what i feel it always tends to make him feel worse. maybe i am just trying to hard to stay friends, he means so much more to me, he was my first best friend, first boyfriend and i feel like i am failing him. My mentality is not always clear. I am just not sure what to be experienceing right now.
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 19, 2005 23:23:48 GMT -5
Hah, well I left my boyfriend about a week ago for the exact same reason, funny coincidence eh?
I think right now you two should take some space, because the feelings and emotions are still too fresh. I know it's hard, but it's really the healthiest thing you can do for yourself - just take a lot of quiet time to meditate and sort it all out, if your mentality isn't quite clear then it sounds like that'll be a big help. Perhaps you two will end up being friends later down along the road, or perhaps you will never really get back in contact, all I know is that what he's probably going through right now is made worse by you keeping in contact. Guys can get confused and frustrated that way, you gotta give clear signals.
So take a month off, and then give him a call, and see where it takes you. I have to say that my situation is a bit easier to make a clear decision on because my ex is being a complete asshole to me, he's even dating a new girl now even though it's only been a week just to spite me. If I needed a sign that I made the right choice, there it is.
If you want to talk, send me a note, we could probably help each other. ^_^
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Post by seraph on Sept 19, 2005 23:32:50 GMT -5
Aw thank you for the response, i know i should probably wait a while, but i am so impatient some times. You seem like a very gifted and wonderfull woman just from what i've read on the forum. Talk to you again soon. Erin
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 20, 2005 18:05:18 GMT -5
Well Arya, seeing as my ex had the emotional capacity of a doornail and absolutely no understanding of his own feelings, god bless his little heart, I think he's dating this new girl in an attempt to make himself get over me. He really was very attached... and he wasn't expecting the breakup at all. I wish I could explain to him that he's just putting himself through more misery by trying to date another girl while he's still in love with me, and I feel sorry for the new girl he's going out with even though she's one of those girls who finally drove me to leave high school... you know, "emo/goth/punk whatever they call themselves these days"... because she doesn't deserve to be used like that.
But what can ya do, right? I had a long talk with my kung fu sifu about it and he made me feel much better, even though it hurts to know how far my ex is going out of his way just to hurt me, his actual actions mean nothing.
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Post by Shaelyn on Sept 22, 2005 0:48:53 GMT -5
Maybe it's just me. I don't know. the word "lose" isn't in my vocabulary anymore. Maybe it's just that I understand "everything happens for a reason." Maybe it's that I can see how we're all connected. Maybe both. Regardless, I don't feel like I lose things...people...relationships anymore. If things fall out, sobeit. It's a part of the process, a part of life. I'm still connected to that person, that never fades. But...if we fall out of step, there's nothing wrong with that. We're just both growing at different paces, or different directions...or in some cases I just need to get out before my sanity is destroyed, lol. Nothing wrong with that at all. I just think that...if a relationship falls out of step, it was meant to. What relationships I've held on to have been detrimental to my growth during the time that I held on...and those that I've let come and go throughout my life have been fine. Trying to force something to stay when it's time for it to go doesn't really help matters, I've found. When it's time for to go, it's been for the best. As for you making him worry...this is where the self-responsibility comes in. Life is made up of reactions. We react to others, and they react to us. You distancing yourself is your own reaction to your desire to grow spiritually...and his reaction to that is worrying about you. You are never, NEVER responsible for how others react to you...but you are responsible for how you react to their reaction. You're worrying about him worrying about you. Is that really the healthiest reaction for yourself? Believe me, you are NOT failing him. If he worries about you, that's his deal...but you can take care of yourself. You probably think that sounds kind of selfish. There is a definate line between the two...for further insight, here's an article I posted on another forum: s8.invisionfree.com/A_Listening_Ear/index.php?showtopic=192As for what you should be experiencing...everything you are experiencing is perfectly normal...right down to not knowing what to be experiencing, lol. I've been through the same thing. I once dated a guy for three years...the first year was great, the last two years was a series of make-ups and break-ups...deep down I knew it was time to move on...but I wasn't ready to accept that, so I clung like glue. That was the worst thing I could have done for myself at the time. At any rate...I also understand that you are not going to fully grasp what I am saying until you go out and live it for yourself...and I wouldn't blame you if you did. It is a *hard* realization to make...and experience is the best teacher. It hurts...but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. ...in my experience, the "let's stay friends" thing has never worked. That's just my experience, I know other people who have stayed friends with every ex they had. But for me...the ties have been too strong, I've had to sever them completely if I was to stay away from them for good. Like I said, the lesson that "everything happens for a reason" was a HARD lesson to learn...as was that just because he swept you off your feet in the beginning doesn't mean he's going to care about much more than your body in the end...which is the other reason why I've had to sever ties. They wouldn't have made good friends if I had tried. Furthermore, some of my male friends, I've had to break off the friendship...because they were interested in me, and getting a little too...close. They would cross the line once without permission, and I'd warn them...and keep a close eye on them. At that point usually it's a matter of time...I can't hold their trust anymore, it's evident why exactly they're in this "friendship" ...and then, almost without a doubt, they'll do it again...or in some cases, I can't trust myself with them, and I have to push them away. No, it's not easy...but it's always been for the best. I have to be responsible for my own happiness...and allowing myself to be torn between two guys...or the guilt I have when I'm worried that I'm letting a guy do something that my boyfriend wouldn't like...or having to watch a "friend" constantly because I don't trust them, is not being responsible...so I end it, and that's that. CM had wonderful advice...to take a while off. ...I'd go as far to say that...if you don't feel like you need to call him when your mind clears, don't bother. That may compound things...that may give him hope (depending upon the situation) that would be misleading...or it may drudge up the feelings again that would fog your judgement. I've known some guys that could twist words around in such a way to send me into a tailspin...they could get me to jump off a bridge for them if they wanted to. So, if you do call...please please PLEASE keep your wits about you. Not to say this guy is the same as my ex's...but as long as the possibility exists, be careful. A lot of guys out there know how to turn a woman's loving and caring nature against them without a second thought. I know this post probably sounds a little harsh, or probably makes things sound impossible in one way or another...I assure you it's not. My situation may not equal yours...this is built up on my own experience. Just...the last thing I want, is for you to be as naive about all this as I was.
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Post by seraph on Sept 22, 2005 8:16:20 GMT -5
Wow thank you for the long post Emily it really helps to hear from someone who has experienced the same thing. Thank you!
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Post by luz18 on Sept 22, 2005 9:49:45 GMT -5
CM, I can't believe what guys would do to get back at girls. Maybe you're better off.... who knows, maybe in a short time you'll find a guy just as intelligent, as sweet and as knowledgable as you... And as for you Seraph, keep your head up! Shaelyn is right, you shouldn't worry yourself sick about the fact that he's worried. As long as you try to explain as clearly that you can, and as long as you know that you tried, you shouldn't feel worried or guilty at all. And remember: No matter what your bond with this guy, it's amazing what a guy does when he's really hurt. At times, they can become unrecognizable to us in their actions, because they do things that they normally wouldn't do. So just be careful. Lots of Love, Luz
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Post by Shaelyn on Sept 22, 2005 19:09:05 GMT -5
You're quite welcome. I'm always happy to help in such matters if I can
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 22, 2005 22:23:59 GMT -5
A deep tissue massage therapist told me once, "Men are completely more sensitive than women." It's hard to recognize because of how both sexes are trained to believe the opposite.
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 23, 2005 13:26:48 GMT -5
Lol, that's SO true, Cherise! My ex was always trying to play the part of a hard ass, but my leaving him has hurt him so deeply that he just doesn't know how to handle anything anymore. He even went so far as to go online, delete some of my favorite accounts, write all sorts of slander about me... Luz, I definitely know I made the right decision, we went out for 2 years but by the end I realized that he was nothing like me and I needed someone a bit more mature. I'll always love him though. Shaelyn, that's great advice that you gave, and that forum helps so many people! I really enjoyed reading what you had to say. ^_^ That's exactly how I view life too - if something is meant for you, it will come back to you. If it is not a part of your path or has served its purpose, it will leave and something greater will be given in the future, or you will heal in miraculous ways (and angel told me that once.) So far I have been healing miraculously... I've been trying to lose weight for years and in the past two weeks I've dropped almost ten pounds, my vibration heightened to the point where now I can't stand to be inside for more than a few hours at a time, otherwise I start actually fantasizing about just going outside and sitting on the grass. Nature is more a part of me now, I can't really explain it. Anyway, all this rambling is just supposed to show that sometimes we must give away what we hold most dear in order to receive something even greater down the road. ^_^ And we'll all be able to talk about it up in Heaven afterwards, so don't think of it in a "forever" sort of sense. When you view life in terms of "we shall exist into Eternity", choices become much more clear.
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Post by Shaelyn on Sept 23, 2005 13:55:46 GMT -5
Anyway, all this rambling is just supposed to show that sometimes we must give away what we hold most dear in order to receive something even greater down the road. That's very true. Ok here's where some of the info in my previous post came from: I went out with a guy for three years. The first year was great. Everything was going wonderfully...but of course, that's because he put on that show that men put on to try to impress their lady. He did that for the first year, and the second year it all dropped...there's more to it than that as to why the second year it all went downhill...but it did. But anyway, that second year I got to see what he was REALLY like...and I didn't like it...he ended up using me and abusing me (not physically, but yeah...abusing what I gave him, and at a few points verbally abusing me...and oh was he manipulative. Like I said, he could get me to jump off a bridge if he wanted)...but at that point, didn't even consciously realize any of that...I was attached, so I saw him more for the way he used to be, not as he was. Anyways, I finally broke up with him...and he cried on my shoulder. Oh my God it was heart-wrenching...so, he easily managed to weedled his way back into my life...making me feel sorry for him, he acted like he cared. I thought he did care. I realize now that he did-- he cared about my body, about my money, about having control over someone...mostly the first and the last. But still at the time, I thought he cared about me, my emotions, my spirit...and I really didn't want to lose him--I kept having these thoughts, "am I doing the right thing? what if I'm not doing the right thing, what if he IS the One?" ...so we started playing the make-up break-up game, I was torn between those thoughts, the big What Ifs, and how I really felt about him. I wanted to break up with him, I knew it was for the best...but I could bring myself to. I cared about him too much. He meant too much to me. We were supposed to spend our lives together. I didn't want to lose him. It took two years for me to ask myself, "what's to lose?" When I finally let him go...I gained so much. I gained my sanity, independence, freedom, and self-esteem. I gained my life back. I learned what to look for in men. I learned how to be in control of myself, while still looking out for others...the balance needed to be self-responsible and responsible for others at the same time. ...and then, I gained a guy that really cares about me. ...That was a lot of hard lessons rolled up into one experience...but I'm glad I learned them...and I'm glad I can let others know, so they won't make the same mistakes I did There's been other people in my life that I didn't want to "lose" ...some of them I let go, some of them I held on, some of them I held an inner debate with myself for a LONG time, and held on the entire time until I made up my mind...yet in every instance, I was or would've been better off letting them go. "The only thing that remains constant is change." People will flow in and out of your life...let it flow.
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Post by luz18 on Sept 24, 2005 5:40:18 GMT -5
"The only thing that remains constant is change." People will flow in and out of your life...let it flow. There's a lot of wisdom in that quote... God knows I have trouble of letting things go and accepting change... I'm glad for you, CM
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Post by seraph on Sept 24, 2005 15:47:35 GMT -5
Thanks everyone for you comments. I don't know if its just today or not but i feel a lot more content. I know that it was for the best and for the first time in a long while i feel happy and content just to be loved by myself. I know in the future something better will come along and for right now I'm content with being in the Now and learning to be ME!
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Post by Shaelyn on Sept 25, 2005 0:29:23 GMT -5
wonderful! it's good to feel good Luz...heh I think that was me you were trying to quote. I had quoted CM in that post...but that wasn't what she posted.
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 25, 2005 10:53:39 GMT -5
Oh yeah, I was reading that quote and I just thought... well... I know I might have said something similar but I don't think that's me. I actually thought that maybe you got it out of a completely different thread altogether, lol! The credit definitely goes to Shaelyn in this one.
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Post by jeremy on Sept 25, 2005 22:57:43 GMT -5
In my experience, breaking up is hard no matter whose idea it is. The story of the end of my relationship had certain parallels to Seraph and CM's stories, without being really the same. In my case, it was my ex who broke up with me, but it was because of some of my higher vibrational traits. In the beginning, she'd been drawn to me because of my unconditional love of everyone and my childlike appreciation of all creation. Well, anyway, a year later, she kind of realised that this guy who seemed so right to start with was actually really different from everyone else she'd ever gotten to know and that started to scare her. I wasn't surprised when she left me for another guy because I'd been feeling the relationship grow more tense for a while. It hurt, but I was relieved, I was glad to be free. I admit to being pretty antisocial towards her for a while afterwards, sometimes even deliberately unkind, but underneath I was concerned for her, knowing the guy she'd run off with was just using her hurt me much more than the fact that she was with another guy. Fortunately, she came to see through her new bf as well, and I'm friends with her again. I wouldn't go out with her again though but that doesn't seem to be a problem.
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Post by indigophoenix on Sept 26, 2005 10:00:48 GMT -5
CM, I can't believe what guys would do to get back at girls. WOOOOOOOHHHHHH-WOOOOOH-WOOOOOH Hey now, I take offense to that statement. Are you trying to imply that a girl wouldn't stoop as low as a guy would in this type of situation? I certainly hope not......
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 26, 2005 20:11:06 GMT -5
Yeah, it would be nice if all people could handle their emotions easily, but we're all here to learn I guess. I mean we're lucky that we have it so easy right now, life is hard, and I'm not even getting started, haha. Yeah Tom, I don't think Luz was talking in that context, but you're right and girls do a lot of nasty things too - like that saying "Guys always cheat." Well, in a lot of cases I see girls cheating just as much, I guess it depends on the soul inside the body. I'm sure you can identify with that. The best we can do is try to understand where people are coming from and accept them for it, even if it causes ourselves emotional backlash. That's what I try to do with my ex, no matter how hard it is sometimes.
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 27, 2005 0:19:52 GMT -5
Women can be emotionally stronger than men. Men can be more sensitive than women. If we admitted this globally, the world would be much better off because women could finally be at the forefront of the necessities of life. It's inherent to our ancestral memories, and a big key to the evolution of our times. It's not a competition about who is better, it's about accepting our differences.
Our grandmother's couldn't even vote at a point in their lives. Whatever they fought for, women are just beginning to express NOW. People can be equally crappy, regardless of gender. But, it's definitely time for greater numbers of women to step forward, and time for men to own up to their inner-most real and sensitive feelings. Please. xo
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Post by indigophoenix on Sept 27, 2005 21:54:12 GMT -5
This is what I personally don't agree with. Men and women aren't as different as most people would like to believe. We all have similar wants and and the same needs. And I think it's nothing more than a stereotype to say that women are more emotionally intelligent than men. So many women fight for equal rights and to be treated as equals to men, and at the same time, so many women set themselves apart from men. Seems a little contradictory to me.
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Post by Kivawolfspeaker on Sept 27, 2005 22:15:10 GMT -5
I agree Indigo. I don't really like Feminists who think all males are evil or whatnot. These are usually called "Gender Feminists". There are feminists who do think males are just as caught in the stereotypes as females are.
Kiva
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Post by indigophoenix on Sept 27, 2005 22:21:51 GMT -5
Thank you for your support Kiva!!!!!
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 28, 2005 1:47:30 GMT -5
Okay everyone, don't go loco.
I said
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 28, 2005 1:48:30 GMT -5
Women "can" be emotionally stronger than men. Men "can" be more sensitive than women. It's not a competition about who is better, it's about accepting our differences. Our grandmother's couldn't even vote at a point in their lives. Whatever they fought for, women are just beginning to express NOW. People "can" be equally crappy, regardless of gender. But, it's definitely time for greater numbers of women to step forward, and time for men to own up to their inner-most real and sensitive feelings. Please. xo THE WORD "CAN" WAS USED IN ALL REFERENCES, NOT ARE! Sometimes, men and women respond so predictably to this issue. The tone of defensiveness in the responses was totally unnecessary. It's a dark reminder that people are consistently resistant to change, especially if it is foreign or unknown. Yes, we do have similar wants and needs, but as a gender we are different. Not better, not worse, but the (r)evolution is not about labels (feminists, conservatives, president, prime minister, mother, or soldier), it's about a shift in energy perspective. And, if the evolution is not moving towards a feminine perspective, than where is it going?
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 28, 2005 2:26:33 GMT -5
Please Indigo Pheonix,
I'm not saying women are emotionally superior to men. I'm demanding that the differences be celebrated. Just like my mom, just like my grandmom, and so on...
Over-reaction, and fear of loss of something is holding us all back. Why would I deny the lives and hardship of my matriarchal family, and say their wishes have no place in my life RIGHT NOW. I'm not going to ever want anything else on this Earth, except for the global shift in perspective that it deserves.
Kiva,
Why are you throwing the word "evil" around so loosely. Nothing about what I said even resembled that intention. It's alarming. I'm sorry, but I feel that reaction perpetuates the stereotypes that divide people.
Arya,
We all definitely have equally "feminine" and "masculine" polarity. It is well known as Yin and Yang. And, yes, we are taught how to respond. My whole point, both sexes need to step forward in those opposite polarities and break out of the pre-made packages that are supposed to be our gender definitions. It's ultimately time to celebrate the equality of matriarch and patriarch. But, people have to acknowledge the differences first, and celebrate the heck out of them. It's completely parallel to the struggle of cultural predjudice.
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Post by thecrystalmaiden on Sept 28, 2005 13:40:47 GMT -5
Anyone who has been in a relationship cannot deny that there are times when women seem overly sensitive and times when men seem very oblivious to all the emotional undercurrents women seem to deal with (I mean come on, how many times have you guys screamed out in frustration, "Why can't you just TELL me!!!"). It is that feminine/masculine duality - I will not draw extremes, because there are always exceptions, but I've been friends with girls and I've been friends with guys (probably even moreso for this reason), and girls - especially young ones - live off of their emotions. Men have a very different intellectual strong point, it seems, a much more "knowledge and information" side to them, not so much a "dive into the emotion of every situation." Once again, there are ALWAYS exceptions, and I am speaking of youth, before people start growing and changing and learning to deal with these differences or experiencing life - which makes them less extreme.
We each have different hormones controling our body, each gender has a different purpose. We all know it. How many times has a man said "I just want to protect her!" and a woman has said "I want to nurture him like he's my own child!"? That is testosterone and estrogen speaking, and how good would a man be at protecting if he was constantly being sensitive about things? And how good would a woman be at nurturing and caring for her children if she is not sensitive and emotional to their needs? You see, it is a duality that compliments the other perfectly and balances out.
However, as Phoenix said - all human beings have the same needs. We all need love, acceptance, understanding, and security - just as we all need food and water. That does not change, no matter what sex or what background you have, and it does not make one better than the other. We each need the other half, because without it we would be incomplete. It is beautiful in this day and age to see that the differences between men and women are being looked on as less extreme, but we must remember that those differences do exist and they are for a very important reason. Survival. And please remember, women were "supressed" in the first place for their own safety, because back in the old days that was necessary.
We're all right, you see? Isn't that a wonderful thing. ^_^
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Post by indigophoenix on Sept 28, 2005 22:15:43 GMT -5
Thanks Maiden for helping me get my point heard. First of all, I wasn't being defensive. The only time in this thread that I got defensive was when Luz said that "I can't believe what guys would do to get back at girls," as if a girl wasn't capable of the same thing.
All I wanted to clarify, was that if we (men and women) really want to be seen as equal, we gotta stop magnifying on the things that make us different, and keep in mind what makes us the same. This is where prejudice and stereotypes come from.
And yes djgirl, I know you only said "can," but that word can be applied to ANY statement and the statement could never be considered to be false. For example, "I can/could be the most emotionally intelligent person to have ever existed." (and no, i wouldn't think this in a thousand years, it's just an example.) And there is no way for you to prove that statement to be false. I was just taking the context of your message into account. So:
Women "can" be emotionally stronger than men. Men "can" be more sensitive than women. Is what you said.
Yes they can be, but Men "can" be emotionally stronger than women. And Women "can" be more sensitive than men.
It's all about each individual person, and I am just tired of getting lumped into categories because of my sex. Just please stop looking at me as a male and start seeing me for what I truly am, an individual.
The fact of the matter, is that I know a guy who is more feminine than any woman I have ever met. And I've also met girls that are more masculine than most men I've ever met. The only difference between men and women that I see are our anatomical differences and I'm sorry but I just don't see my mind changing in that respect.
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Post by djgirlcherise on Sept 28, 2005 22:49:57 GMT -5
Hey Everyone,
Thanks for reading this most interesting topic.
I want to talk about this topic to express a different option of thought. It's so heated, but very exciting.
No one person can lump the sum of these two polarities as equally similar or different. Every one person is the force themselves, and the self cannot know one self completely, until it returns the the source. It's absolutely not possible to say that one can be more than the other.
It's the PERCEPTION of these differences that keep us afraid. SHIFTING is always occuring. It's time to move forward in our thoughts as leaders already.
That means ACCEPTING these shifts of polarities that are equally different and the same, at all times.
The "exceptions" you mentioned are, most strong and proud, the ACTIVIST gay and transgendered community. These people are moving forward in thought with feelings, thoughts, and actions.
Canadian national law finally recognized the equality of the "exceptions", and now they can freely marry, raise children, and finally be seen as equal human beings. That is progress. Can't we move forward in other areas already?
The problem with both genders: They are repressed. It's a crippling worldwide crisis, and it can't be swept under the carpet anymore. It can't be the topic we're not supposed to discuss because our parents told us not to, it's not polite, good-mannered, or in good taste.
Reactionary words lead to actions regretted, or re-learned, or re-cycled. Which is where we are at now globally. In the re-cycling stage. Real equality is such a breath of fresh air. This re-cycled version of our "equality" is stale.
Despite this, there is still magic in women and men. Collectively, we need to be encouraged to step forward. Women need to be more analytical like men, and men need to embrace a gentler fear.
I think you're right when you say we need water and food, but most important is love, and only love, we have no right to project anything else beyond that. Everything else is what you SEE as right or wrong.
I wish we can move beyond just writing about the problems, and become the solutions. To move beyond the global gender repression, acknowledging the plague it is on life, we do need to OPENLY celebrate the differences.
We cannot remain a homogonized and marganalized society. The gay community is leading the way in this struggle by being flamboyantly OPEN and demanding EQUALITY. Even if it means stepping out of the gender they were born into. That's progress.
They have given the world a blueprint for breaking beyond the repression and reactionaries of the world.
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Post by jeremy on Sept 29, 2005 6:54:46 GMT -5
Consider the following statement: "My partner and I just broke up." In my case this would be a false statement since I've been single for over a year, but for the purpose of this exercise let's assume it was yesterday. What do I feel? What will I do about it? Why did it happen? Can you answer any of these questions using your own knowledge and intellect? To even guess an answer to these questions would be completely arrogant. What I'm getting at is this: don't assume things about people. For one thing it's arrogant and will make you unpopular, but you'll also look stupid when all your assumptions are torn apart. People don't fit into convenient little boxes no matter how hard we shove them. We should love each person for who they are not because they akwardly fit some label we've invented. Another thing to remember: no matter how well you think you know someone, be prepared to be surprised by them. Please, don't label people, let them be who they are and some day you'll see their beauty. This thread kind of makes me wish I hadn't disclosed my physical gender on this forum, I am so different to what people think guys are like. It's not that I'm feminine, or androgynous, I'm something else again. Get used to it.
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Post by luz18 on Sept 29, 2005 11:47:34 GMT -5
First to make some corrections from my carelessness: Shaelyn, I was addressing that message to you about the quote, but, silly me, I didn't write that it was *for* you, and then I skipped ahead and wrote a seperate message to CM. Lol. It sounds confusing, but I was giving you credit for it Sorry for the mix up, you two! Indigo Phoenix: Wow. my comment has caused a bit of controversy on a sensitive topic. Let me reassure you that I did not mean it in the way you probably understood. When I said, "It's unbelievable what guys would do to get back at girls", I wasn't intentionally making a generalisation. The comment was referring to CM's particular experience (and even some of my own experiences). I never once said that girls/women don't do the same... I know that statement to be as untrue as everyone else. I think that there was a bit of misunderstanding concerning my use of language and meaning. Women want to be treated as equally as men, and yet they set themselves apart, and the stereotypical comments certainly don't help the problem. I think the reason that there is a division is because people are quick to point out the obvious differences between men and women instead of looking at the subtle-but-there similarities. I am not looking at anyone as just a typical male, or a typical female. That would be extremely shallow of me, and I am not like that. And it also makes me uncomfortable and even slightly defensive as well, that my comment offended you so much, seeing as I agree with most of your points, and I never intended on starting a whole argument about women being better than men, and now I'm being seen as someone who "labels". At the end of the day, we chose our bodies for a reason, and what matters is who we truly are.... Our differences are here to distract us from finding out about our similarities.... when we find something in common with each other, something beautiful happens. You find out that everyone, while seemingly different on the outside, can relate to you... can share with you. Because in truth, we are one BIG family, and we all come from the same Source.
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